突然之间...

早上起来...

有种莫名...

的伤感........

If u already knew that a thing is right down to earth impossible to be done..

will u still do it?

everyone is telling u to give up...it is impossible.. too hard..

for me.. I will do it!

why?

simple reason...

maybe this impossible shit is a life changing one..

either towards good or towards bad..

that.. I shall know later after I completed the impossible shit..

do first then think is never my way...

mine is .. do first...then never think... and of course think first..then never do..

x) Cheers!

The moon is no where to be seen when the sun is out...

but it is always there... =)

when the sun set..

the moon looks perfect...

in the way.. that it is softer than the sun..

in the sky ... with all the stars..

never alone..

The sun..although it shines radiantly.. but

it outruns all the other stuff in the sky.. hahaha

but

of course...

we cannot live without the sun...

but can we live without the moon..?

the moon reflects the lights of the sun...

so..

yup..all things are dependent on every other things..

but can u fly to the sun?

so..

let's fly to the moon... =)

If u dun make a choice...

then the choice will make u.. =)

- the movie Ghost Rider.

very well said...

Have u ever imagine...

if u r one day being stranded on an island somewhere in the pacific ocean...

remember.. an island may not have any running water...and it is surrounded with tonnes and gallons of seawater..

will u choose to leave the island? or choose to stay at the island waiting for help?

First, find garbage dump which are being washed up to the shore by the ocean...bringing tonnes rubbish thrown by humans.. There u may found something useful... either to make a raft or keeping u survive..

then of course find a way build to fire with smoke.. signalling nearby passing ships..

of course u have to find water... blah..blah.. blah..

If u r interested... go find out in Man vs Wild.. I saw this guy cook snake in the heating sand in desert and eat the snake.. LoL... he is just a survival skills freak! I love him!

ya.. I watched that stupid show back again..

hahaha....

coz.. it is impossible we will be going to any island somewhere in pacific ocean and stranded on it..

and I will find a way to get out from that island... coz..when u r building a raft or something.. u have stayed on the island for quite some time rite... so..if no help comes.. then we get out la.. hahaha.....

by the way.. it would be very nice to see a shark in real... x)

a great way to die too... who say u must be dead when u see a shark? lol..

but shark.. I do think they are cute...

u know why they want to eat u?

because u eat them in the first place..

Ok.. gotta back to study...

Keys off!

Peace..! -in within-

xD

Finally finished the research paper in 20 hours...

If I could get an A in it.. I will stop facebook for half a year...

LoL...

Today is the last class... T__T I will definitely miss this prof.. he is the best teaching prof I ever seen for history courses... u know.. history is a very dull subject... but he teaches it in such a cool way.. lol... very helpful when u want help in doing thesis paper... I went to see him 4 times..

T__T why there is no such prof for science courses?

Humanity profs are really more human I guess.. hahaha.....

I will definitely miss him... Can I go see him next fall and the other terms just for fun? maybe to discuss some philosophical stuff... Hmm.... Dunno can or not... hahaha.... being a friend with him would be nice.. =)

freak... till here.. only I realized the way I narrated my blog..it is so sucks.. hahaha..... boring...

= =

Finally I m fed up with the anime Bleach...

now I catch back Detective Conan... hahaha.... guess I like stuff that is more using ur brain.. not just slashing up monsters... xD

Can someone's brain be just like Conan? or should I say just like Sherlock Holmes.. yaya..both are fictional characters... but...the authors? must be very smart too rite? I mean in real life.. they must have people who have outstanding observing and interpretation skills... Hmm.. detective..sounds cool.. xD I hope I can have a brain like that...

Most students say... "Why holidays is so short... I do not want to be back in class again.."

but me? "I want more classes... I m afraid of holidays now... mind it.. I just want class...but I don't want exams.." lol....wtf..

Learnt that... we should really appreciate it when we have the chance to learn... see...u should be grateful that u got the chance to learn the knowledge in this fast moving world... how cool is that?

Don't ask me why the way I write have become so dull... not-interesting...boring.... I do not have the answer... maybe when u start to grow older... u lost ur sense of humor??

hahaha.... between ur humerus and ur ulna.. there is this funny bone... I don't know what is the function of this bone.. but it definitely does not look funny to me...

that day I went to search for jokes on the net... read through all the jokes that people shared... and I found out.. I didn't even laugh at all... =__= ...

I just found out... my study table is really big... till now.. I just using only half of the table... one side laptop.. the other side books for research paper plus I can write on this side... the other half which is the upper half.. I still leaving it blank... Hmm... is it me turning thinner... or the table is really big? Damn... I hope is the latter .. not the formal.. hahaha....

Every four hours... I feel hungry again...

Every four hours.. I automatically wake up from sleep...

Every four hours.. I feel sleepy...

24 divide by 4.. six.. I can do each of the above actions twice..

ya..

I eat twice a day.. lunch and dinner...

I sleep twice a day... night and day nap.. people said 8 hours is the perfect duration for sleep...but I split it up..so is it fine? hahaha.....

so total.. I spent my whole 24 hours just doing all that above.. x)

Cheers!

Wait till I have another interesting post ... but I guess no more after this... (come on! even this is a shit post..)

so long... Ciao!

WHEN IS SUMMER GOING TO END?! I WANT WINTER...!!!

Wait till I get home next year.. I will rock till the house fall! LoL... I miss my beloved piano.. please wait for me.. xD u r still the best although I m starting to get attracted to other digital pianos like Yamaha...Korg..M Audio also not bad.. lol....

I run from hate, I run from prejudice..

I run from pessimists, but I run too late..

I run my life, or is it running me...

I run too fast or too slow it seems.

When lies become the truth,

that's when I run to you..

I run to you - Lady Antebellum 2008..

great song.. lots of other fantastic songs from this band.. x)

You can do everything without the help of others...

but you can't help others without doing anything...

xD

but I guess... this world keeps spinning because u help others and others help you..

this is why you and others are here for...

We are here to help... and of course..

for us to help.. there must be a problem to be solved or a situation for us to help rite?

so.. there are others who are here to create problems too.. LOL

and so I hope I m the one who is here to help...and not the one who create problems.. hahah

about the matter of being helped? nah.. I dun really care... coz I like doing things with my own strength... unless it is really a serious problem ... xD

hahah.... missing my brothers... how ridiculous it is for time to pass so fast...

already three years? hahaha..... really uncivilized la.. hahhaha

ok.. that is all..

Ciao! sleeping...

Cheers people!

I love diet coke... xD

This is what I meant by a perfect day..

x)

It will always be perfect as long as u think it is.. x)

and u can actually know who are the regular passengers on the same bus as u hopped on the bus at the same time after your class.. so..

yup..today.. surprisingly there is another person on the same bus.. hahahaha.....

and although I didn't get to speak to that person...

but the person just made my day..

x)

simply a perfect day... =)

not forgetting... of coz plus a load of caffeine in the bloodstream... x)

Ok.. Ciao!

Keys off..

still gotta take a nap..

and I totally forgot that I have an assignment due tomorrow..

I want to shout out FARK!! 100 times..

LoL.. but who cares.. today is the perfect day.. and I m not gonna ruin it by a stupid assignment..and a stupid research paper.. x)

Cheers!

A shout out to those people that having your last month of summer break...

Have lots of fun..!

coz I believe u guys had a great and fun summer holidays..

and I have a wonderful summer too...

coz I had learnt something out of my own boundaries... and yup..a little bit out from the classroom.. =)

and I believe every summer will be better than its previous one.. =D

Ooh.. I just love raining days.. x)

Just updated coz I changed the music for the blog.. =) so wanna share it with the readers

very cool music... hahaha.....

Watched Erm...let me count... 2 and a half movies yesterday...

Blackhawk Down ... X Men Origin: Wolverine... and the anime Cat Shit One.. LoL ...

I guess when we are down and feeling not good... sometimes..we need to keep ourselves outside of the situation rite? just escaped for a while then going back again...

I prefer this way.. escaped for a while then face it again... x) but I will not escape forever.. u know me... being responsible is always in my dictionary.. x)

Blackhawk Down.. war movie.. but very very touching and inspiring...

there was a sentence in the last part of the movie... where a sergeant speak to a corporal..

"Why are u going back again... this is suiciding..."

"There are still people trapped in there..."

"......."

"Long ago a friend asked me why would I be a soldier and fighting other people's war...I kept silence coz they won't understand it no matter what I answered..

It is not about being a hero.. it is about saving the man beside us..."

"No one gets left behind..."

T__T Thumbs up for this movie... =)

It was based on a true story in 1993.. Somalia..

19 US soldiers perished and 2000 militia killed...

coz of a wrong info given by the intel...

imagine that.. 19 against 2000... aih... war...

Wolverine too let me learn something.... his persistent and his courage.. hahaha

I guess no matter what movies I watched these days... I still learn something... =D

O ya.. Cat Shit one.. LoL .. this was a anime made by Japan that is not in theater..and it is free online..

very cute and touching too .. two rabbits going for war... and saving each other.. =D

When we are stress... not happy... bothered by some shit... we just have to give a break to ourselves... dun push ourselves too hard.. then we come back... and strike again.. hahaha

ya.. that is my reason for procrastinating and wasting time...

Got my midterm result yesterday... Hmm... I will not say I m not happy about it...and neither not satisfied with it... coz everytime I keep asking myself.. "Is this the best that u could do?" "Why other people can do it and u can't?" ..... now I would say.. "If u can do what other people can do.. then u are not being urself rite?"

hahahaha....... Maybe I m not the material for scoring high grades...maybe I m a material for some other stuff...that is still not discovered by me yet... =) hope so it is like that...I do not want to be an epic failure..

so yup... that is me.. always giving excuses.. lol.... till when will I be satisfied?

I tell u.. we human beings will never be satisfied no matter how... although if u said u r satisfied with what u have now... please...u r just lying... ur brain thought so..but does ur heart feel that way?

One more thing... please don't fake urself in front of me.. I m not stupid.. I can tell if u r being real or u r faking urself... this is just what I m good in... =D Sometimes I can tell what u r thinking..so please dun fake urself in front of me.. u disgusted me.. how pathetic....

Just please don't do that.. if u don't like it... just show it.. not like I will kill u on the spot..

ya.. maybe last time I would.. but now... I will not... lol... coz.. we are adults now... last time we used to be teenagers..

Yea.. enough said... no matter what happened.. I m still going to be myself... coz no point of changing myself for some shit... coz like my brother said.. I m already in deep shit.. LoL...how true...

Peace!

Keys off... x)

No person and nothing really makes me laugh heartily...

coz.. I know ...

deep in heart ...

those laugh u all trying to make are just bullshit...

when there is a problem arise...

There is always no one there to help...

This what I meant by loneliness...

but this doesn't mean I will isolate myself...

I will still try to make the people around me laugh sometimes...

Will still try my best to help you all when u all have a problem...

those that really know me... u know how I behave as a friend..

never mention how I behave as a brother...

and by the way..

I really dislike those people that...

when they need u.. they made u feel like u r needed..

when they do not need u.. they just push u aside..

ignoring u...

ya.. u get what I m saying...

but all of this is fine with me...

coz... maybe I do treat people like that...

so.. when u don't want someone to treat u badly

u shall not treat people like that at the first place...

Ok.. enough said...

Never mind... this type of feeling..

to be honest.. I had had it for a very long time...

no matter where I am... no matter when ... no matter whom I am with..

there is always this loneliness creeps in...

maybe I shall blame it on my poor human human relationships...

I have no problem communicating with non-living things...

yea.. that is all..

=) Cheers...

I know I have to accept this forever... but never mind.. it is fine afterall... this is no big deal..

who doesn't feel lonely sometimes? =)

sudden thought.... x)

Decided to reopen the blog... coz today is Canada's Civic Holiday... and I m "civilized" .. so I will open my blog again... hahaha..... and I may close it again .. some other time...

(Don't say I purposely closed my blog previously for this entry.. that is bullshit.. LOL...)

Ideas I realized today:

Emptiness of Emptiness... x) I love this thing.. so empty yet so full of meanings... hahaha

To me it is like a deep empty well of emptiness... so deep down...and once u jump down and start to be embraced by it..u actually feel that nothing is there for u to feel empty... and empty is there for u to feel nothing.. x) nature of reality... ( this is only my own perception... It doesn't mean it should be like that..)

U find less joy and less happiness and pain if u r loving only one person... maybe if u r lucky u love more than one person...lol...

but u will find great joy and happiness...less sorrow..less pain if u starting to love everyone .. everything... =D although if u do shit to me.. I will still like u from now on.. it is no point to hate anyone.. why would I have to dislike anything or anyone when there is like.. LoL ... (facebook only have like button...why doesn't it has a dislike button..? coz first to keep the harmony within community and second...ya..why should there be dislike when there is already like as the choice of urs?...u can choose to like or dun want to like.. just do not dislike) LOL

This is called great compassion... at least that is what I think it is called.. x)

Enlightened.. Hmm... Great eh.. I think it is just not great...not greater and non of the greatest... it is there in everyone..just a matter of whether u want it or not.. x)

Never be ignorant.. u know what I meant by ignorant don't you? coz everyone is being ignorant... LoL... ignoring what is wrong (never will get lesson from the wrong things u did)..worse..ignoring what is right ( never will be taught and be advised for good).. but what is wrong and what is right? Hmm...

When u start to accept everything...there is nothing for u to accept..

when u accept nothing... then there is everything for u to absorb...

Mind plays an important role...

again.. I will say it is not important...just a matter of whether u have the mind for it or not.. not brain ..it is mind.. x)

Dun get distracted or depressed or miserable or confused or ponder over what I said today...

This was everything that I learnt today...

When I came of thinking about it... I actually learnt nothing...

maybe tomorrow I may learn something..

the day after that I may learn nothing again..

so.. no one taught me everything... and everyone taught me nothing... or maybe it was everyone taught me everything.. and no one taught me nothing...

at the end.. I may have learnt nothing or everything... hahaha..... be careful.. what is nothing when u got an empty mind?

It has to be empty at the first place to be contained .. =)

U have to have nothing to have everything.... and yet.. u have to have everything to become having nothing...

U have to be empty to be full... and yet.. u have to be full to be empty again.. x)

Again... I already mind you... Dun get too distracted..too confused.. too wanting to ponder over what I wrote... Dun go to bed tonight still recalling what I wrote in the post today...

Do you know what is Sudden Realization?

It is like I m telling u a joke... u have to catch the laughing point at that instant to burst out laughing rite? if u didn't catch the laughing point.. no matter how hard I explain to you.. how hard u ponder over it... u still will not laugh..although if u did laugh.. still u will not enjoy it..

and this is what sudden realization meant... u have to leave it... stop thinking about it.. stop studying it.. then u will realize it out of a sudden... =D

But this doesn't mean u can leave it without reading it.. without studying it.. without pondering over it...

Let's take an easier example...

Let say.. u never taste a durian before.. u know durian?

Ok.. then ur south east asian friend who likes durian keeps on telling u how much he misses durian... how tasty .. how good durian is... he tells u everything about durian..

then...regardless whether u r interested.. if u r interested.. u went to find out what durian is... u google.. u went to find books...news...facts about durian... growth rate of durian...structure of durian till its atomic component... if u r no way near interested... then u may also heard before durian from other friends...other news..other websites..other sources..

so now u know damn lot about durian... u know everything about durian...

but still u know nothing of durian... u didn't get a real taste of durian...

then one day... one day.. out of a sudden..

u found durian selling at super market..

so u bought one and tried it urself..

and here... Tadaa... u know .. u realized the true .. real essence..taste of durian! LoL ..

all of this sudden realization of how durian taste like ...

now only u can choose to accept the durian or not.... x) for some people durian is unexpectedly tasty..and for some people.. it is just not nice... LoL

all of this is what we always called... "ZEN" (a simple word perhaps u took a glance at nowhere...heard from no one.. read from no other books...or a word u saw from somewhere..heard from everyone..read from some books...)

Sudden realization...

x) now have u catch the point?

***first part of my research paper? Hmm... interesting...?

Nah... things like this is just too smart for me... coz I m oversmarted (this word is nowhere to be found in dictionary)... xD

If u were to say that this post is simply brilliant.. I may take it as nothing but keep in mind.. I may take it as everything as well.. x)

If u say this is bullshit... I may also take it as nothing.. but keep in mind... what is nothing again?

LoL... dun confused nothing as empty.. x)

Keys off...

*Warning ...

Do not get confused... do not ponder over .. do not get miserable .. do not argue over this post...

Leave it... coz if u were to realize what I wrote... u will realized and fully understand it instantly when the time come if it was not just now..or if it is not now..or if it will not be next time.. x) so when the heck u will realized it? I had said... u will understand it suddenly... x) it could be just now...it can be now..and it can be next time.. hahaha.....

Anyway.. this is just my sudden realization at this second... the next second.. I may have another sudden realization.. x)

Ciao!

(shit.. I still haven't got any idea what to write for my research paper after writing this blog..)

FML --> For My Love in History....

And Oo.. ya.. people.. dun mistaken emptiness with nothingness... x)

just take a cup as an example...

how does the cup empty?

we often said a cup is empty when it does not contain liquid or solid rite?

but is the cup really empty?

consider air filling the cup...

if u said why don't we put the cup in vacuum?! O__O

then what about the light filling in the cup?

Oo.. vacuum + dark?

so what about the radiation in the cup? or spaces in the cup..?

the cup must has space inside rite?

LoL ....

actually... the cup is empty ..

because which part of it is the cup?

it is cylindrical? it is spherical? or any shape...

nah...other object that is not cup has those shapes too...

because of its function?

nope... glasses or vase can perform function as a cup too...

hahaha....

the cup is only a cup because of all the components that make it a cup...

if u break one of it...let say u break the cup into pieces..

is it a cup anymore?

LoL

the cup is only a cup dependent on all its external circumstances..

The cup is empty..but is cup is not nothing because the cup exists... x)

I think I wrote a post about something called a table with similar crap.. Hmm.. anyway.. it is interesting.. doesn't it? LoL ...